Saturday, December 22, 2007

LOOK OUT, PLANETS ALIGNING AGAIN!!

(guest blogger John Wessling)

It's a very rare occurrence when Jupiter, Mercury and the Sun clump together, and even rarer for me to give a shit about it. Seriously, I pay about as much attention to the celestial plane as my cat does to the stock market.

But alas, for centuries, assholes have gazed at the heavens, geeked out of their gourds on absinthe trying to make some sense of these little dots that they failed to mention in the bible.

Well, not exactly. About 2007 years ago, they did mention a glowing collection they called the NORTH STAR which led three dudes to the baby Jebus.

I don't necessarily think these two events are related, but I know there are plenty of fanatics who do, so I choose to stay ready. I keep my bathtub full of water throughout the whole holiday season, just-in-case.


Remember, it says that when Jebus returns he'll be as a lion, not as a lamb. Just like John McClain in Die Hard 2.






I think he's already back...in the form of Tom Brady!
3 Super Bowls, undefeated season, bony-boning a supermodel...if you were the son of God, W.W.Y.D?

Only 2 more days until the APOCALYSTMAS!!!
-jw

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