Wednesday, January 23, 2008


"I'm cool. You're a dork. Go write how cool I am in your dorky newspaper."
A nonprofit group of journalists found that the Bush administration lied to the public close to 1,000 times in the path to war with Iraq. I don’t blame the politicians so much: they’re sleazy lyin’ bastards, it’s what they do. You could put Dick Cheney in a pin full of puppies, and he’d grind his jaw like the Great Cornholio, lie to the puppies about food and pets, and then start twistin’ their necks well over 180 degrees. That’s what makes him Dick Cheney.

It took a group of journalists over six years to say that Bush was lying about Iraq when it was more obvious than a Marine’s gimp leg. They all knew he was lyin’, they’re not stupid, but even a mostly anonymous non-profit group of journalists waited until Bush was lamer than a duck in the window of a China town butcher before they called him on his warmongering matinee show. Hell, even Bush has to be surprised how far he’s gotten.

Journalists were afraid of losing their “privilege” to cover the Whitehouse in fear that they couldn’t pay their suburban Virginia and Maryland mortgages, much less afford diapers or kids’ tuition But still, how about you show a little sack, contemporary media? It’s not like Woodward and Bernstein had four-car-garages in “All the President’s Men,” back when you saw that movie and it made you want to be a journalist.

But sure, you’re a bunch of heroes for getting together and coming forward with this report six years later. Way to go, dorks.

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