Monday, January 28, 2008

MISS AMERICA: PHLOGGED

When Miss Michigan announced her platform would be eating disorders an eerie silence fell over the entire room until Miss Arizona’s bile eroded teeth fell from her mouth and scattered on the pageant floor like tic-taks.


Looking at this picture is like looking at a JC Penny catalogue from the future. Except for fatty in the middle.

I'm not sure I would call this a talent, but I do like it.

“Here’s some snacks for the losers because this year we're being more hip, honest, and insulting.”

The Miss America Pageant, on The Learning Channel. I’d say both have fallen on some hard times.

Miss America’s integrated marketing department sucks.

“Here’s your crown. Try not to let anyone take a picture of your cooter, and you’re good to go.”

“This is my grandmother who was Miss Michigan too. Yeah, I know, assholes. I’m just trying to enjoy it while I can.”

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