Tuesday, February 12, 2008


Barack Obama’s bigger than the Beatles were when they said they were bigger than Jesus.

McCain couldn’t even get booked as the opening act in front of a crowd this big.

“The blonde up front wants to party. Is she cool?”

To be fair, college kids will rally around a picture of anyone with that photoshop effect on it.
“Look, we heard about it Carl, you touched Barack Obama’s hand. Now will you please shut up and get back to work? Fuckin’ A! He’s not gonna fix your problems.”

“Yeah, um, I don’t know how to say this, we appreciate your support, and all, but you’re kind of making Obama look crazy.”

“If Mom finds out you brought me here, she’s gonna be pissed. You know who we’re supposed to vote for.”

“I don’t care whose headquarters this is, you will vote for me.”

"I don’t know why I moved, I just did. Can I have a fucking ballot please?"

"Didn’t I just vote for that same proposition three times?"
It’s been a long time since anyone climbed a tree to see a candidate.

“I can’t believe you forgot the hacky sack.”

I think I saw this kid selling knock off t-shirts outside a Black Crowes concert too.

Obama has even captured the elusive under 12 vote.

“I brought my blind brother, so you could heal him.”
"Me too!"

“and with your help, I’ll have a mocha-latte with a sprinkle of cinnamon.”

America hasn’t been this interested in what a black man has to say since Richard Pryor caught on fire freebasing.

Even ghosts show up for an Obama rally.

No wonder America loves Obama, he brings donuts to the rally.

“I want cream filled!”

“Barack Obama wants to let thousands of illegal Canadians cross the border. Don’t we want somebody ready on day one? I’m Hillary Clinton, and I approve of this message.”

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