Wednesday, July 9, 2008


How is it that in Iran movie theatre technology is considered the work of Satan, yet missiles are just peachy with God?

American exports to Iran have increased tenfold during the Bush years, with the most popular items being cigarettes and bull semen. It seems hypocritical to increase trade by 1000% with the final remaining axis of evil, but maybe we’re trying to undermine the government’s cultural authority like we did when we sent blue jeans and rock n’ roll into the Soviet Union. Let’s face it, steak and cigarettes are pretty fucking awesome. Add a jar of whisky, and I’ll salute any flag that comes on the receipt.

However, Iran test fired medium and long range missiles today, which makes me think someone might have switched the labels on the cigarettes and bull sperm.

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