California prison officials admitted that Charles Manson has been caught with a cell phone in jail for the second time in two years. Apparently the officials became suspicious after pizza delivery guys kept showing up at the prison door ritualistically slaughtered.
The main fear is that Manson could use the phone to call people and have them do his killer bidding for him, which he could potentially be pretty adept at, since he never really did his own killing in the first place (pussy). But let’s be honest, anyone who’s left from the Manson family, is fairly old by now, and if you’re weak enough to get killed by a 73 year-old lady, well, something else was probably going to take you down soon anyway, like a breeze or a glass of water.
For some reason, I find the image of Charles Manson using a cell phone oddly hilarious. It’s kind of like picturing Jim Morrison driving a compact sedan, but a lot more murdery.
Personally, I’d like think Manson was just using the phone to make prank calls:
“Yes. Hi. Um, is your refrigerator running?”
“Yeah, it is. Who is this?”